No exceptions (still in india)
Stability in Mind, Not place
Whoop, whoop, surprise, surprise, Stephanie is in another part of India. I am not sure how I manage to crave stability and create a schedule that prevents all forms of such occurrences, but here we are. Actually, I am extremely stable. Sure my physical location is shifting almost every week, but internally I am exceptionally solid for my standards.
How am I so solid, you may ask?
Do what I love, no exceptions
Be around beings I love, no exceptions
Feed myself well, no exceptions
It’s not that deep
How is this manifesting practically?
I am climbing almost everyday, surrounded by monkeys, goats, piggies, kittens, cows, puppies, and more, more, more. Life is all around, and I am enamored by the life worlds each body inhabits.
And when I say climbing, I mean outdoors. Sandstone. Almond-red. I only say almond because supposedly the town is named after the color of the rocks which I guess to some squinting eye is almond-colored. Badam: almond in Hindi/Urdu. Badami: almond in Kannada.
I am filming or photographing pretty much everyday, taking the advice from a photographer-friend in being more patient and intentional with the frames that enter my SD card. A little more artist, a little less panicked to capture the moment—it’s proving wonders, methinks.
I launched a podcast. Here’s the link: https://open.spotify.com/show/7DXTDQNQmvVVt1nJ49mZkk?si=d513185199624b5c
Things are coming together. I am validated by others, but most importantly, validated by myself. Mashallah.
At the end of the day, everything is one life, and I will be grateful for whatever gifts come my way in this journey. It’s a little bit Buddhist— desire (expectation) no longer shackles me. I dream for my present just as much as I dream for my future. Sehr gut, sehr gut.
Books clubs are fun. Highly recommend. Stay informed with the academic literature, Ms. Stephanie. Stay informed.
Nature being nature (and my observations of it):
A mother dog walks with a baby pig dead in her mouth. Her pup, the size of the piglet, trots behind delighted.
Monkeys (at least bonnet macaques) masturbate. I didn’t mean to see this. I just zoomed in on my photo :/
Today I saw a monkey whose face was completely ripped off. Eye holes barely existing and perhaps a Voldemort nose. She still got the male’s attention (bang)
Watching a kitten licking her mother in good favor so she can sneak in a breast feed is iconic strategy.
I get why pigs are haram. Very cute, but watching them in the sewage is pretty nasty.
New characters
Let me introduce you to a few characters that have been enriching my time here in Badami.
First there is my climbing dad and Belgium brother. These two guys are the ones who have taught me the most so far in climbing, advantaged by more English than others. We become a makeshift family because we are the only white people in this town, so naturally people assume relations.
My climbing dad is one year older than my in-real-life dad, and even has a nickname for me: “Orange.”
Yes, so there are small things that easily make me beam like a lightbulb, and being offered an orange is certainly one of them. At first is started with a sliver or two, and now he gets a full orange exclusively for me. Sehr gut.
My Belgium brother is one year older than myself, and is on his worldly adventures post-graduation (I guess like myself). He started here in India and next week is heading off to China. I guess we reversed our paths with me starting in Taiwan and then coming to India.
Secondly, there is the local gang. The owner of the rock climbing company I am making a film for has his own posse of 3-4 guys. He is definitely the ring leader, and the bros come and go from his house as if it’s their own. The bedroom becomes the main congregation place where they all gather on the twin bed, a breast-feeding kitten jumps on, and a projector 1.5 meters from the wall shows cricket as white noise. Sometimes I join, sitting at the desk, to work or eat lunch: always chapati.
After a day of climbing and filming, one of the guys (or two of the guys) takes me home on the motorbike. Yes, we are sometimes three people on the motorbike, a common occurrence in India. In some places you will see upwards of 5 people plus children squeezed on these banana motorcycles. Maybe even a goat or two.
On the way home, I beg to get sugarcane juice or coconut water. There are many stands that freshly grind the sugarcane or slice open the coconut with a curved blade. Sugarcane stands close earlier, so that sometimes is not an option. One of the homies’s brother has a coconut stand so we tend to go there, and after I sip the water, they break it open, and I use a piece of the outer shell to scoop out the meat inside. Very yum. Electrolytes and healthy fats.
For the posse, they do not speak much English, but they all figured out my fascination with monkeys quickly on day one. Now they call out to me every time they see one. I am slowly training them to do the same for sugarcane juice.
Today, we become a true climber.
Yes, I have officially completed by first lead climb route. For those who are unfamiliar with the sport, rock climbing has many varieties. The most common type is top rope, which is where a rope drops from an anchor above, linked to you. In the case that you fall, you do not fall very far. Lead climbing, is the climbing that allows for top rope to happen (otherwise how would the rope get to the top at all!). Using quick draws (a carabiner contraption), a person climbs along an intended route, clipping the rope, that comes from below, into bolts vertically along the path. If the climber falls above an anchor point, they fall twice the length: from where they are to the lower anchor and then that distance again. That is where it becomes a bit spooky spooky.
In top rope, one can also get some assistance from the belayer (the person controlling the rope at the base of the rock), to help pull you up through a difficult section. In lead, as soon as you pass your last anchor point, there is no rope assistance, so every movement must be generated purely from your grip and strength.
Lead climbing is beautiful. The rope is no longer distractingly in my face, and the flow state is a requirement, not an option. There is no room for panic or being bayparwah (carefree). There are stakes, consequently requiring focus and precision. Before the climb, I did some breath work. In sports, regularly before I competition I am working to calm my nerves, but the desire to perform never fully silences them. Ideally, they would be silenced, but other sports like sprinting or tennis do not mandate their disappearance. In climbing, any nerve would break my performance. Energy conservation is a must— from the subtle arm shakes to reduce the pump or lower a heel to give the calf some rest. All must be considered if one is to climb a route successfully. Nerves would accentuate any and all fatigue. Therefore, its presence was completely unacceptable.
And it worked— I was the most in control of my mental state that I can immediately recall (and I’ve been doing pretty good at emotional regulation recently, not to toot my own horn). There were parts of the route where I was unsure of the best hand or foot placement, but I went up anyways, holding onto uncertainty, without letting nervousness incapacitate and distract from the end goal.
Sugarcane juice for everyone, on me.
—
My climbing dad also helped again today. I am developing quite the knot in my top forearm, and of course climbing dad knew what to do. Electronic acupuncture. Right there on the rocks, he pulls out a pen-like stick, places it along my skin, grabs my wrist with his hand (to complete the circuit), and bloop! My hard jerks, I gasp. Not pain, but surprise at the uncontrolled muscular response. He tries again, with me now prepared for the sensation.
I do not know how many of you have been electrocuted before. If you have been a consistent reader of these blogs, then you would know that I can comfortably say that I know what being electrocuted feels like.
Anyhow, the electric acupuncture device is a metal ball tip that when placed on the skin feels like tiny, tiny needles or a static shock, but thinner. Depending one the placement, other muscles will start to shake uncontrollably (in this case my hand). The treatment requires about 3-5 minutes of this, and then once removed, the concentrated tightness had mostly dissipated. We did it on my shoulders too, and wow, I have never felt more free.
I do not recommend you try this treatment without expertise, but my climbing dad is highly knowledgable in this field, so I handed over my trust.
