Acceptance (and monkeys and weddings) in Pakistan
Assalamualaikum
Pakistan is going splendid, splendid splendid.
Since I last wrote, I shifted to a new friend’s house. This house is absolutely stunning with rugs of rugs on carpets. I used to think the layering of such things was silly silly, but I have converted and I want everything to be soft fabric.
Every time I come to Pakistan, I am understanding this country better and falling deeper in love with the nation. The ambiance and spirit of the people, from my outsider, non-native speaking perspective, is something to cherish and emulate across the rest of the world. The love I have received from strangers that adopt me as family is something I hope to acquire and gift to people in my present and future life.
Staying with family’s is just about my favorite way to interact with a place and people. To see demonstrations of elegance that unveil a rich layer of acceptance and strength—particularly in the women.
I am learning that life’s struggles are really only struggles if we choose to be limited by them. Perhaps it’s resorting to thickening my skin or increasing my tolerance threshold, but I think this is the way that I want to survive and pass through life. I want to live unbothered, and that ultimately starts with me.
What I mean is that our boundaries and definitions of acceptable and unacceptable are malleable. What is appropriate is contingent on a cultural context, not an empirical or normative truth. Therefore, I become more flexible with what bruises me, seeking to accept things as they come rather than become burdened by an unchangeable external realm.
I wrote in my notes for this writing that “vulnerability is healing,” and looking at this I am confused. I am honest. Honest to a fault. Vulnerability I think four days ago was helping me let go of my past, but as time is settling, I realize I am so engrossed in it, still. Ugh. Burying myself in work and busy-ness is a temporary suppression, but leaning into these feelings is a useless feedback loop. Hmmm. Not sure what to do with that except persist with living.
Anyways, back to Pakistan.
In the first few days at my new place, I have done many things. The world really is granting me so many unexpected gifts. Blessings.
First, I went back to Murree hills. This time, there was no snow, but we had a picnic and made instant noodles by a pine-cone fire. I highly recommend nimko as a topping. As a trying vegan, I had kawah (green tea) instead of chai.
I got my second dose of monkeys on this visit, heading to a military base where they are known to roam around. One of the rhesus macaques must have had some genetic mutation, and had the most gorgeous golden fur. Unfortunately I was a silly goose and misplaced by SD cards, so I only have a low quality phone photo to share.
I met with wildlife filmmaker and community organizer for breakfast.
I picked an orange from an orange tree for the first time.
I am going viral on Pakistani Instagram at the moment.
OH! And apparently one of my university fellows is visiting home, so he invited me to his cousins wedding and so I went to that last night. My hands are designed with mehndi, and I wore a pastel pink gown that with a spin, I become a barbie princess of my childhood dreams. Never did I believe I could feel so elegantly beautiful until I wore the gowns I have been honored to dress in while in Pakistan.
